Satanic Musings-Part 2 The Awakening

The power you feel next to your altar. Looking at the picture of Satan. The black candles burning. I had invoked Satan and the Demons to watch over my worship.Naked. (I prefer to worship naked. Nothing on at all. No watch.Nothing. If cold then I wear a black cloak)  I had recently shaved my head. Completely bald. It had taken 6 months or more of thinking about. Should I shouldn't I. But Satan pushed . On and on. So here I was. Breathing deeply.Getting more and more horny. It edged and flowed. Sometimes I would keep this up for an hour or more. I loved it. And I'm sure Satan did. This was a new type of religion. This was a new type of worship never experienced before.Very conscious of my body. There was a certain peace within.Early on I would blaspheme over the xian "bible"Sperm all over it. I would let my mind run riot. You were free to think as you pleased.Total release.Wow what pleasure.
Now we came to new decisions.  The first was 'giving your soul to the Devil'. To do it ?Not to do it.?It is something you do not HAVE to do. It is up to the individual. For me for some reason it was a must. Why? Possibly it bought up initial fear which I had to move though and at the same time a certain "thrill'. Do you have a soul? I don't know. Who knows? Does not matter. But for me it was sought of "a right of passage' I felt I had to go through. Strange as although never been an xian, although went to xian schools, I suppose some of the early indoctrination had stuck. So we got a black paper and wrote out our Satanic request. We sealed it with our blood and then burnt it. Again from a situation of mild apprehension one had a feeling of release.
I think it must of been a few weeks or maybe a month or two later I was chatting on the net to another Satanist.-a Satanic Priest. He suggested I do a ritual he had thought up called "breaking the chains". It was an interesting ritual.One set up these chains in the figure of the cross and part way through the ritual you broke them apart and threw them on the flour. To symbolize in some way your break from earlier indoctrination. And so the development progressed. Another Satanist Priest had written a ritual in which you married yourself to the Beast -the Dark One. Hmm this one I also accepted with relish. To be the partner of the Beast I found in some ways mind blowing. The  changes in me I felt were slow but the strong Satanic foundations were being built upon brick by brick.

Satanic Musings-Part1

One of the most important things to do once you have realized you are a Satanist is to find a group who can advise. This is terribly important. You need someone who has been further down the path with whom you can communicate and discuss. As you are developing on your own it is extremely useful having another Satanist to help you along that path. You have to realize what is happening to you as a Satanist is quite normal and not odd at all. To succeed on this left handed path you must be aware that you will break down mental barriers and all moral and other indoctrinations that have been placed on you. That can be scarey when you start out on this path. But as one becomes more experienced you learn to accept it. From my own experience I came to realize that on the right handed path the kundalini or energy at the bottom of your spin should go up the back to the brain. But I came to the opinion on the left handed path the energy should go down. Down the anus. This is helped by homosexual acts especially anal fucking. And so the best and most experienced Satanists are homosexual males. Other humans of course can be Satanists.  But I think they are never as accomplished as the male homo. Second are lesbians who can be extremely powerful Satanists.
For myself I became a member of a Satanic Male Homosexual Group. There were group discussions. Information from email and various classes. These were people with experience. People who had been Satanist over time. There information was invaluable.But one thing I was aware of initially -and I mean in the first few years-was the the growth was painfully slow. I was putting down strong foundations. Changing and reassessing old training. This was not to be some quick four week change around . You know wham bam done that got the tee shirt-now I'm the High Priest of Satanism. No this is a life commitment. An unending walk along the spiral path down into Satanism. It never ends, always changing until the day you die.
The major first thing I realized was I was free. Free to think as I wanted .Free to feel as I wanted.Free if you like to do as I wanted. For years I had thought if as a human being an idea comes in your head it is valid. No one can say it is not. But you get these moralistic pseudo religious creeps and other busybody types always telling one what you should do. You are a human being just like them . They know no more than you. You are the only one qualified to know what you want. Don't be fooled by there crap and controlling ways. Then you will see how one has been manipulated by society. The manipulation is very powerful. So always be on your guard. Remember between 1400-1700 in Europe between 2-8million humans were burnt at the stake for this. Many were just local herbalists and witches doing no harm. Again be on your guard.

Satanic Musings-The Start

Once you realized that there was no going back .No escape or you did not want to escape what was the next cause of action.There are few books. There are no covens on the corner. There are no priests wanting your money.This is a private relationship between you and Satan. You have to listen. Go with your gut instinct.You must develop that. Hear the sound. Listen to your unconscious brain. Meditation yes. For me I set up an altar. I put pictures on it. Stones -anything that I felt was relevant. I made a black mirror. I got black candles, incense etc. This was my journey. My partner was horrified. I was octricised. Other people were told. He has gone insane. The looks!!!Phew. All part of the course for some . The more they shat over me the more I fought back.I mean was I not an individual free to choose his destiny?What the hell was going on with these people. Oh yes the whole thing is a con. Its all ok as long as you tow the line. Fuck that not for me. Anyway I was glad the partner refused to share my bed . I was quite prepared to do this alone. So at night I was free to do as I pleased.my altar was beside my bed . This was my gateway to Satan.
I would light my candles,ring the bell, invoke the four corners and carry out incantations to Him.Most I had gleaned off the net. The first thing I noticed was I seem to always get very horny around my altar -especially when I was doing worship. So fine I started masturbating over my altar. It was very normal to me and I got the feeling Satan enjoyed it. Sometimes I would also put pictures of naked men on the altar. I would do many different prayers to Satan that I found on the net. I found my sexuality increased ten fold. Once or twice my partner when occasionally we did have sex said it was like having sex with the devil-which of course it was. Fantastic.Strange things started to happen to me . I made a black mirror and put it on the altar. Once in worship I had this feeling that a strange power was in my stomach and started to come up my body. When it came to my mouth I let out a growl then a raw. Another time I felt demons were going round and round me-watching.Another time when I was close to an xian I felt this quite growl within. Strange fantastic stuff.I loved it. I also found that the more horny I became I also seemed to become very anal. Perhaps Satan was trying to get into my head and bit by bit breakdown ones earlier indoctrinations. This I now realise was so-But it is a long road which never ends.Untill there are  no morals left and all indoctrination destroyed.
But I realized I was a complete neophyte. And I now realise the road one has to travel is long and arduous.It is not for the faint hearted.But the power within grows. But that is for another time

Musings on Satanism

To accept Satan is probably the most dynamic development that any human being can do. It is in the initial stages when one is chosen by the Dark One terrifying. When it happens to one it can be mind blowing.
Especially if one has come from a very conservative background. It can also well happen when going through trauma or stressful situations. Satan may have watched you for years waiting to break into or finding a kink in your armour. Once a small thought process happens in the brain-and your initial reaction can be like mine -horror, it will start to expand. It will never leave you. Like me you will be drawn back again and again.No one will have converted you to this. It is a between your consciousness and Satan. It is no use fighting this. Satanism is like religious anarchy. It is total freedom to think the way you want to. The only rule is there are no rules-a koan? There is no right or wrong. You set your own rules. There is no sin. But beware the law of cause and affect exists. You can and may carry out heinous things but the affects my come back to haunt you -such as prison. Satan will tempt you but you and only you can decide whether to carry them out. It is your body your mind your decision. As you go down the path to Hell all your early and original programming will be brought to the surface and be questioned. All your so called morals will be rearranged.
It will make you powerful. But it is not for the faint hearted. It is for men of strength. Young men can find it very overpowering and should always be on their guard. The older you are the better as it seems you have at 50+ more emotional control and experience. There seem to be very few women on this left handed path.
The other interesting point I have found is that many Satanists are homosexual or bisexual. If not already then it will develop as it should on this path. Satan likes horny sexy men-as do His Demons. Once you have accepted Him you will be on an ever moving spiral pathway to Hell. It will become overpowering.Then you stop and learn to control it. Then you move forward again. It becomes overpowering. Then you control it again. And so on and so on etc.